Have you and your fella taken the 5 Love Languages test?
This short love languages quiz radically changed how I approach loving my husband. I always used to buy him a lot of little gifts throughout the year. I would grab a bag of pistachio nuts, a couple hymnals for his collection or a rugby shirt. He was so sweet about the gifts, but they never seemed to make him quite as excited as I expected.
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Then we took the Five Love Languages test, and I was shocked by the results! Gifts were the lowest on his love language list, and they were highest on mine. And physical touch was highest on his list, and lowest on mine.
It’s not that he did not like the gifts, but they did not speak love to him in the way they spoke it to me. We are just wired differently.
In light of that discovery, I have cut back on the gifts I give him, and he has started buying presents for me now and then. We both feel more loved.
Love languages matter, and I encourage you to love on your fella by giving him (or doing) something that speaks to his specific love language!
Words of Affirmation
Words of Affirmation is one of my top love styles. I get all warm and fuzzy inside when someone says something kind or encouraging to me. If your fella feels loved in this way, why not write down a bunch of reasons why you love him?
- Use Window Markers to write him a message! For my Hubby’s Birthday, I bought some window markers, and wrote a message to him on the mirror in the bathroom. Sometimes it is the simple things that mean the most!
- Knock Knock What I Love About You : This little book is so much fun to fill out for your Fella for Valentine’s Day. It is PERFECT for the person who’s love language is Words of Affirmation.
- Why I Love You: A Journal of Us: This is a sweet book, and and would be a great gift alongside the Knock Knock What I Love About You book.
- Put together a photo album from the past year. For our anniversary, I designed a photo album and ordered it off of Shutterfly. It was the story of our year together, and my hubs (just my boyfriend then) absolutely loved it.
- An engraved pocket knife: every guy should carry a pocket knife, and this one has a special message on the handle.
- Write down 52 reasons you love him: put each reason in an envelope, and tell your man to open one every Monday for the rest of the year!
- Cover the house with sticky notes, and on every sticky note write one thing you love about him (I’ve done this too, and let me tell you–we were finding sticky notes for weeks. Ha!
Acts of Service
If your fella’s primary love language is Acts of Service then you could make him breakfast in bed, cook his favorite meal for supper (and do all the dishes and clean-up yourself) or even make him a coupon book with tasks and dates that he can redeem at any time! Since this type of guy feels loved by you accomplishing tasks be sure to do little things all day for him that show how much you love him.
- Give him the gift of a clean car: buy some car cleaning products, and sneak away to clean his car inside and out for him. You could even buy a few goodies for his vehicle like a car mount for his phone, a car trash can, and an air freshener.
- Considerate Coupons for Couples: I am not really into the mushy, lovey-dovey coupon books–but this funny, witty and charming little book is definitely worth a few dollars.
- Pulled Pork Shredder Claws for BBQ: Why not give your honey a good cut of meat along with these shredder claws, and tell him you will prepare the rest of his favorite meal while he barbecues the meat!
- Basket of Coffee Essentials including some kauai caramel coffee, chocolate covered espresso beans, and this hilarious “Don’t Talk Until I’ve Had my Coffee” mug. For the coffee lover make him a basket of coffee essentials along with a coupon for a daily cup of joe made by you!
- Make him breakfast in bed: Let’s face it, guys are often motivated by their stomachs. Take the time to make him a special breakfast with lots of meat (if he is an omnivore like my hubby!).
Receiving Gifts
This one is pretty self-explanatory, and is my top love language. If this is your guy’s love language then one idea would be to arrange a short little scavenger hunt for your fella, with five or six little, fun gifts. You could have the scavenger hunt around the house, throughout your town, or, as I did for my Fella one year, throughout a college campus. Here are a few more ideas:
- These wonderfully crazy men’s dress socks: I love these socks so very much. Probably because they remind me of a few of my brothers. If your fella works from home or has a more relaxed dress code at work, then these socks would make a fun gift!
- Shaving gift set: If your fella likes the clean shave look (or even more importantly that is what you prefer, ha ha!) then this classic shaving set would be an excellent gift.
- Hot Sauce gift package: one of my brothers is crazy about hot sauce, and for his last birthday I gave him one of these sriracha to-go clip ons and he looooved it.
- A new book: if your guy is a reader then grab him a copy of Three Men in a Boat, The Count of Monte Cristo or Unbroken. You could even get him the movie to go along with the book!
- A collection of gifts for his workout: if you guy likes to work out as much as mine does then you might want to give him some compression tights, a wedding ring he can actually wear at the gym, this Beast t-shirt or even some wireless headphones for his music!
Quality Time
For the guy who loves quality time, you are going to have to set aside a chunk of time for him. He doesn’t want gifts, tasks accomplished, or words to tell him that you love him–he just wants to hang out with you.
- Take him bowling: Did I ever tell you the story of when I took my hubby, brother-in-law (who plays in the NFL) and a couple of friends bowling? My hubby and brother-in-law completely schooled us. Sigh. But it was still fun…I guess…;-)
- Enjoy a movie night at home: cuddle up with your sweetheart and watch his favorite movie. You could even buy two of these adorable popcorn tubs!
- Book a hotel at Hotwire, and spend a weekend away: Hotwire is my favorite website for getting fancy hotel for cheap prices. We have stayed at some of the most gorgeous hotels for fifty or sixty dollars a night.
- Go Skydiving: If this is your thing then more power to you! Ha ha! Skydiving for Valentine’s Day = perfection.
- Go Ice Skating: This would be the top of my list for Valentine’s Day.
- Go to a concert: if your fella is a music lover then grab tickets for his favorite band or orchestra!
Physical Touch
This is my Hubby’s love language, and though it might be harder to find gifts for this area it is still possible! Here are a few ideas…
- Give him a massage: buy this couples’ massage book along with some natural oil (I love this sweet almond oil mix!), and a coupon for an hour massage!
- Give him a cashmere blanket: perfect for movie nights, and snuggling up underneath.
- Take him out to dinner, and instead of sitting across from him, sit next to him: sometimes when we are in a booth I sit on the same side as Hubs. The waiter might give us an odd look, but it is fun to break up the status quo and be close to each other!
- Go on a tour of your city: take your camera, and pretend you are a couple of tourists. Take pictures of everything, snuggle up close to each other, and pretend like you are in a foreign country. It’s fun!
you’ve come up with a great list, love the ones about quality time-so much better than physical material products!
Just a heads up… you’re link for “What Star Wars Teaches Us About Marriage” post actually takes the reader to an Amazon site for a plush teal colored blanket. 😉
Have enjoyed reading some of your posts today. Glad a friend shared. Thank you!
I fixed the link. Thanks so much for letting me know, Brandy! Thanks for reading. 🙂
This is a great idea! Sometimes it’s difficult to speak a love language that isn’t your native. So thanks for the tips!
Awesome tips! It’s so nice you included ideas for each Love Language, since my husband and I both have primary and secondary love languages that score really close to each other. 🙂
Awww… I love that you broke this up into love languages. Nate is words of affirmation so I’m going to look into those suggestions! <3
Such a great and creative list! Thanks for doing all of this research and putting them in one place!
Love this! I’m a HUGE fan of the 5 Love Languages and I recommend the book to pretty much every couple I know! Such a great list of gifts, too. Go figure, but I am AWFUL at gifts – probably because it is my lowest love language! I could read sweet words until I grow old, though! But that’s just me – so I love some ideas for different languages!
This is great!!! Thank you! I finally know what to get my husband for Valentine’s Day!!
I just did a test with my kids on love languages and remembered when I asked my husband to do the test (so I could know what his was) I found it to be acts of service. The only problem with your suggestion is that my husband would think a coupon book would be too cheesy! I think just listening and just making the house look especially nice on Valentine’s Day might just do the trick. That and just showing him love by helping him wherever he has need. That could even just mean singing with him while he plays guitar! Thanks for the post and I will share it! Have a blessed day!
Such a great idea to test your kids so you know how to love on them, Elizabeth! Love that! I completely understand about the coupon book–the important thing is that you know what makes your fella light up inside. I love your ideas for Valentine’s Day, and I might just steal a few. 🙂 May you have a wonderful Valentine’s Day, and thanks for sharing the post!
Bethie,
Wow. Jeepers. I’ve been married for 100 years, yet taking into account his love language when I give him gifts has never entered my (thick) head. Now I have a bit of ‘yinkin’ to do . . .. GREAT post, Bethie! What a revelation!
Thanks, Mom! Hope this Valentine’s Day is great for you guys. 🙂 I think a Valentine’s Day in New Zealand next year would be fun…
Those socks are adorable, great post!
Aren’t they neat, Jess? I might just get a pair for myself too. Just because. 😉
This is brilliant! I have never thought to gift around the love languages and I will put this to use for Valentine’s Day. Thanks so much for sharing!
Thank you for the sweet words, Lecy. Hope you have an incredible Valentine’s Day! I think your blog is too cute!
The love languages are my favorite!! I actually created a gift basket centered around them for my husband.
What an awesome idea, Amberly! Love your creativity.
Such great ideas! Absolutely love the coupon book 🙂
http://www.skinnybelle.com/
I thought that coupon book was just too darn cute. Glad you agreed, Robyn! By the way, I enjoyed looking at your blog. Your photography is just stunning!
These are such awesome Valentine’s Gift ideas, it’s coming very soon and this really helped me on what I should buy!
Awesome, glad it helped!
I love the LOVE LANGUAGES! Great idea to incorporate that into gifts!
Thanks, Jamie! I have enjoyed getting to know our love languages better. 🙂
My hubby would LOVE The Sriracha Cookbook. He is obsessed with Sriracha and I think it is just OK. But for me to give that to him would be a total treat since it is me basically opening up the door for him to make more things with it 🙂
Sriracha isn’t my favorite either, Christine. That would definitely be a sacrifice on your part! Thanks for stopping by. 🙂
Super cute post!! I really want to get that what I love about you book! 🙂 Thank you for sharing
I love that you did this by LOVE LANGUAGE! ADORABLE! Last year for Valentine’s Day I had a hard time with gifts. I was out of work because of a shoulder injury…. so not only was I unable to do something cute and crafty, I was broke. Ha. I did a lot of little things to express my love but one thing was I placed post it notes all over our house with things I loved about him. Occasionally I’ll still find one hanging out somewhere. 🙂
Hey there Brandy! I spent a considerable amount of time on your blog, and I just LOVE it! SO cute! I love that idea of posting notes all over the house. I just might have to give that one a try. 🙂 Thanks!
I shall get “HIM” a hug… Whomever “he” is!
Sounds good, Gigi! Before I met my future husband I kept a journal where I wrote down letters to him, and even bought him Valentine’s. One of the most fun things I ever did. Might be worth a try! And it is so special when that man comes into your life to have years of letters stocked up for him. 🙂
Hi Bethany,
I just love all of these ideas for Valentines Gifts!!! Thanks so much for sharing, now it gives me a few ideas for my man 🙂
Glad it helped, Joan! Hope you have a great Valentine’s Day!
Bethany I am so embarrassed to say that I have never heard of the 5 love languages test. I have been married 10 years plus and I am always stumped on what to get my hubby. I will definitely be looking into this some more. Thanks for sharing!
Don’t be embarrassed, Krystal! There are so many things to learn out there, aren’t there? I bet you will learn a lot of you both take that online test–I certainly did! Give it a try, and let me know what you learn. 🙂
Very nice post, Bethany – I want to check out the books – my hubby likes to pick out special cards for each Holiday – and he does like to cook now and then – which is great for me, as you said! Thank you for your wonderful ideas 🙂
Glad you gleaned some ideas from this post, Donna! Isn’t it just wonderful to have a man who enjoys cooking? I definitely count that trait as a blessing. 🙂
I love that you have ideas for all 5 Love Languages! That book was seriously a game changer in our marriage! My hubby’s primary love language is Acts of Service, while mine is a toss up between Physical Touch and Words of Affirmation. When we were first married, we both tried to show love to each other using our own love language rather than our spouses. We’re still not perfect at it, but we’ve improved greatly over the last 16 1/2 years. 🙂
The important thing is to keep improving, isn’t it Aimee? We may never get it perfect, but as long as the effort to improve is still there–that is what counts. Reading your blog makes me want to start running more consistently. Thanks for the motivation!