So much of life is made up of the murky in-between. Those moments when we are forced to wait, like children in front of an ice cream truck on a warm summer day, our eyes filled with pleasures that are just beyond reach.
A lot has passed since I blogged on this sweet little corner of the internet. Warrior Man and I passed our finals with flying colors (much thanks to coffee, coffee drops, and prayer). Then three days after finals ended, I dropped him off at the airport so he could fly home to the place where flip-flops are called “slippers” and fresh mangoes are a given.
I drove him there in the infant hours of the morning, we shared a cup of coffee, and enacted some dramatic and truthful goodbyes–and then I climbed back into my car alone and drove home.
Since then, six weeks have passed. Six weeks of starting a new job (working as a Chiropractor’s Assistant!) that I love, working long hours as an Assistant Director for a summer children’s program, and trying to plan this wild and untamed beast we call a wedding.
Throughout this separation I have tried very hard not to focus on the time, the hours, the minutes, the weeks, the months. I have tried to discipline myself to hold time loosely in the palm of my hand. I have studiously not looked at the gaping blank calendar.
The Lord has crafted our lives around the waiting. The very birth of you and I began after an incredible amount of waiting. Your mother had to endure nine months before she could see your face. Nine months of sickness, aches, and avoiding looking at the gaping calendar.
Waiting can be misery unless it is laced with the sweetness of anticipation.
And I know that this waiting is precious. Just as the waiting was precious when I waited for my Fella to appear in my life in the first place. Just as a pregnant woman waits with discomfort, but with the beauty of expectation. The birthing of hope.
This morning I took a little peek at the planner I have been avoiding, and noted that only 3.5 weeks remain before I am driving back to that same airport and picking my Fella up for the last time. Three and a half weeks! Huzzah!
I am hoping these next three weeks go by as quickly as possible.
Until then, I am holding time loosely in the palm of my hand, and hiding my calendar–for just a little while longer…
Bethie,
You are doing a beautiful job of appearing to be patient, surrounded by demanding siblings, confusing ‘rents, and o’er-helpful family members. 😉 You have so many gifts, Bethie, and so much to look forward to! I’m just as excited as you (nearly, anyway!) to watch you grow into a loving wife and partner with Saia. A marriage blessed by God is truly such a beautiful thing. Just a few more weeks!
Beautifully written. Anticipation is half the fun in waiting for wonderful things like holidays and weddings, so I hope you can also enjoy the anticipation while you heart yearns for your beloved to return to you.
Thanks, Adriana! I am trying to enjoy the anticipation. Key word is trying. Ha! May I just say I love the picture you are using? It looks like a Little Mermaid pic, and that was always my favorite movie as a child.
Love this! Waiting is definitely hard but always brings something great!
Thanks, Adriana!
Yes, waiting tests our patience. But, as you say, some of the greatest things happen after a period of suspended anticipation. Waiting to get well after an illness, waiting to catch a bus to a party, and waiting to grow up into an adult. We all wait for something.
Beautifully said, Francene. Waiting can be be either invigorating or seep joy from us. Sometimes the only change is our attitudes. Sigh. 😉
That it so wonderful that so many great things are happening in your life right now!
Thank you, Salma!
I know how you’re feeling! My husband and I were very long-distance our entire relationship and engagement, up until we got married. A marriage certainly qualifies as something sweet to anticipate during the waiting period. I am extremely grateful, though, that our days of long-term separations ended once we got married!
I am SO looking forward to no longer being long distance. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, and empathy. I always love talking with other long distance couples as well, and there are so many people out there who have been apart years as opposed to months. Good luck with settling into your new abode!
It’s so hard to wait, but we can know that there’s purpose in it. I have a post up this week celebrating 17 years of marriage — before you know it, you’ll be celebrating that many years. I love your thoughts about holding time loosely. I’ve been working on holding my loves loosely, but not my time. Thank you for sharing.
Congrats on your seventeen years together!! Wahoo! That is so wonderful. It is hard to imagine, but I know that the next few years will go by quickly. That is a good reminder for me as I am anxiously trying to make it go faster and faster–but I need to remember that time needs to be enjoyed rather than urged forward. 😉 Your post about being married seventeen years is so beautifully written.
Nicely said! And I am excited for the next step you are going to take. Be blessed!
Thank you, Elizabeth! Blessings to you and your family as well!