Six months ago today I was walking around surrounded by my bridesmaids, posing for pictures, and trying to ignore the butterflies in my stomach. The feeling of walking down that aisle was unlike anything I have ever felt before. There are no words to describe knowing that you are committing your life to another person. The past six months have been beautiful, imperfect, and incredible.
I had heard so many times how awful the first year of marriage is supposed to be from so many people. Professors quietly counselled not to get upset when the rose petals fell from my eyes after marriage, books encouraged me to keep my expectations low, and still others told me of their terrible experiences the first year. Perhaps it is because hubs and I dated for so long (almost three years) before we got married, but I have found marriage to be a lot easier than those first few years of dating life. We have had difficulties, which I don’t broadcast, but overall married life has been wonderful!
I am so very grateful I get the opportunity to be married to this guy. He makes me laugh every single day, encourages me, and grows alongside me. If I knew in my dating years how marvelous marriage could be I would have done it a lot sooner.
When people ask me what I think about marriage my response will remain the same: “I highly recommend it”.
Highlights from the Past Six Months
I acted in my last collegiate production. Don’t Drink the Water not only was my last show, but also the last main stage production for our beloved old theatre on campus.
Hubs formed an acapella group on campus to sing hymns he had arranged. You can check out a video of his arrangement of Days of Elijah here.
I shot my first photography session on my own of four friends who were about to graduate to become R.N.s!
Hubs had all the wrestlers over, and cooked a huge Thanksgiving meal all by himself including a turkey, mashed potatoes, and gravy!
I finished my degree in Communications with an emphasis in Theatre.
We went on Six Trips in Six Months including getting to see hubby’s family twice, and spend a week over Thanksgiving with my family!
During Christmas break hubby and I watched a musical a day about a week. He had only seen a handful, and I introduced him to Oklahoma, Seven Brides for Seven Brothers, Shrek, and more.
I began researching supplements, and hubs and I have been regularly been taking a slew of vitamins and minerals for the past few months, and as a result we have not fell ill (knock on wood)!
Difficulties in the last Six Months:
We got back from a five-day trip to Ohio, and discovered our refrigerator had been left open. All the food was bad including half of a roast turkey. The smell was horrific.The wrestling team banded together, and gave us a gift certificate to Wal-Mart which was one of the sweetest things.
During my first photo shoot I left a zipper open on my camera bag, and after the session ended I realized I had scattered batteries, and assorted other camera accessories all the way across a park covered with leaves. My sweet models helped me look, but we eventually gave up. Note to self: take the time to make sure you zipped the pocket all the way.
I still have not changed my name on my Driver’s License. Whoops! Need to get that done along with all of my thank you cards from the wedding. I hear that brides have one year to get thank you’s done. Thank goodness for that grace period!
Our drive home from Texas in December was less than safe as a storm cell dogged our tale most of the trip. We drove through the night as freezing rain froze our windshield wipers, snow blinded our vision, and fog engulfed our car. We made it back to Nebraska in twelve hours (it usually takes us eight and a half!).
Things People Have Said About my New Last Name in the last Six Months:
Insurance Guy on the phone: “Spell your last name for me.”
Me: L-O-T-U-L-E-L-E-I
Insurance Guy: Okay, and your husband’s name?”
Me: Saia
Two weeks later I get our insurance cards. Our names on the card are: Bethany and Salah Oopulalay
FedEx Guy: “Last name?”
Me: “Lotulelei”
FedEx Guy: Blank stare
Customer:”What’s your new last name?”
Me: “Lotulelei”
Customer: “Is that French?”
UPS Guy: “How do you spell your last name?”
Me: “L-O-T-U-L-E-L-E-I
UPS Guy:”Like the football player?”
History Teacher: “If you need notes, you can ask Miller. Wait, that’s not your name anymore. I don’t know how to pronounce your new name. Do you?”
Me: “Yep! Loh-two-luh-lay-ee”
History Teacher: “Yeah…that’s not worth it to me…to me, you’re always going to be Miller”.
Well that wraps up a few of my thoughts (and anecdotes) from our first six months as Mr. and Mrs.!
A Few more posts you might like:
What Star Wars Teaches About Marriage
10 Things That Went Wrong in My Wedding
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Almost three years in and it’s still amazing. I’m so glad you didn’t listen to others who said the first year is the worst. I got those comments too and man, they were so wrong! So it goes when people share opinions (myself included). Of course we’ve had our trials, but truthfully, each of the last several years, though each different from the last, has been filled with such joy. It’s hard, but (dare I say??) sometimes it’s pretty easy. It all depends on the marriage… circumstances can make things hard, but if you focus more on God’s grace and blessings, and don’t forget the power of forgiveness, marriage can be well maintained 🙂 Marriage is what you make it! Congrats on 6 months!!
What a lovely reflection on marriage. Thank you for sharing, Joy! Congrats on three years! Wahoo!
I’m glad it is going so well. Keep working hard to make it work! There will be times that are harder than others, but enjoy being newlyweds and no kiddos 🙂 We love it!
Great post! We felt very similarly. We dated for over three years and faced some big challenges. Everyone warned us that the first year of marriage would be really hard, but compared to dating it was a breeze! I am so glad you are doing well. 🙂
Sounds like we had a similar experience, Nathana! I think dating for a longer period of time really helps cut down on some of the frustrations that could be experienced the first year. 🙂
Loved hearing your first few adventures as newlyweds! I think, looking back, I agree with the ‘experts’ that for us, anyways, the first year was the ‘worst’ year of our marriage, not so much because it was bad as because things keep getting better. 5+ years in, we’ve found paths in life that fit us well and it’s nice to look back at the journey together, but now is sure better than that first year. Plus my husband worked 7 pm-7 am the whole first year…so, opposite sleep schedules isn’t something I’d remember as the funnest thing in the world… 😛
Just get used to the name thing. We got married in 2010 and, especially since we moved to my hometown, people just call me by my maiden name. I try to gently remind them that I’m Rachel G. but even the pastor spoke about me as Rachel S. from the pulpit of church a few weeks ago…
Ah, I love this! I had not thought about the first year being the “worst” in terms that it just gets better from here on out. I had never heard it described in that way. I LOVE that idea! Your hubby’s work schedule that first year must have been tough. Our first six months were so incredibly busy I am looking forward to a little less craziness these next few months. Thanks for commenting!
Love the post. My husband and I got married almost 6 months ago too, so it’s cool to hear another perspective! I also haven’t changed my driver’s license name yet. Whoops! I tried once, but was going to have to wait 4 hours! The DMV is not fun. Congrats on being married! And yes, thank goodness for that thank you note grace period!
So neat to be walking this newlywed journey with other bloggers! I am glad someone else hasn’t gotten a few newlywed tasks done too. That makes me feel better!!
Loved this post! I’ve been married for 9 months now and, like you said, I highly recommend it! Like you, I haven’t finished my thank you notes nor have I even legally changed my name (oops) but I’m a theatre fan as well and have been slowly but surely introducing my husband to all my favorite musicals. My new last name is easy, though – Harrison. Being a newlywed is filled with so much joy and daily adventures! Thanks for sharing your perspective – I’ve really been enjoying getting to know you though your posts.
Oh, Cassandra, I am so glad I am not the only one who has struggled with those thank you notes! I got all the thank you notes done so quickly after both my bridal showers, but I am floundering with the wedding ones. I need to get them done! I am so glad to have met you via our blogs!
Ha! I love all those responses to your new last name!
Thanks Mom! They make me laugh. Pretty sure there will be more humorous things said in the future.
My new last name is Putman. You wouldn’t think that would be hard to understand, however it took me 4 visits to the DMV to get a new licence, my insurance card was also wrong, my debit card was wrong and I am still waiting for it to get fixed, and my credit card went from Tupman to Tutman to Putnam to finally Putman. If my new name has caused so much trouble I know it must be really bad for you! But on the plus side, I love the newlywed life!
Four times to the DMV?! Wow! That is such a pain! Your story definitely made me laugh. At least you got a good story out of the deal! I am glad you love newlywed life as much as I do. Huzzah!
The last name stuff is great!!! Thanks for sharing and giving me a laugh today!
Thank YOU for reading!
I love this! I have had just the most amazing time being married so far. Of course there are struggles (although I’m pretty sure that’s the case with life in general, not just marriage) but overall it has been the most amazing, beautiful, fun, phenomenal thing!
(And honestly, that grace period is the greatest because I’m not done with my thank you cards either!!!)
So glad to be on this journey alongside you and Saia! Very grateful <3
Ha ha! It sounds like we could make a club of newlyweds who haven’t written their thank you notes yet. Let’s just all get together some Saturday, each of us could bring a stack of thank you notes, our list of people, and stamps and just get them done while we chat, and sip coffee! Deal? Deal!
My husband and I got married during our senior year of college as well. We were together for a little over three years . We have now been married 8 1/2 years and have three babies! Sounds like you two are just as madly in love as us!